Tuesday, December 30, 2008
Christmas Part 2
Sunday, December 28, 2008
Christmas Part 1
I have the best brother -in-law. He is a devoted husband and father. He was so good to my mother during her final years,went way beyond the call of duty. He has always been there for me and my kids. He is probably the most easy going person I know. All that having been said, he loves Christmas and wants all those around him to enjoy it just as much. He spends weeks decorating his house inside and out. Lights on the outside flash in time to music. Almost every flat surface inside holds parts of his extensive Christmas village. I'm sure that he played a big hand in decorating the multiple trees. Despite the fact that his greatest love (besides family) is sports, it is all tastefully done.
With this much Christmas spirit coursing through his veins, I wasn't surprised that he purchased enough generous gift cards for each of his nieces and nephews (who were in attendance) to play a white elephant game with them. The next day he dressed as Santa and allowed everyone including my crazy brother to take a turn on his knee. Finally, the day wrapped up with everyone being given a pair of reindeer antlers for our special family photos.
I know it seems like I cannot talk about holidays without reflecting on my parents, but throughout the celebration I couldn't help but think about the lengths my father went to when someone wanted a Santa. He would have appreciated the take on his tradition of giving the next generation a chance to fight over gifts or gift cards. The reindeer antler family photos were something my mother would have loved! Even though it goes against what in reality I believe, I like to think that they were watching from somewhere, shaking their heads, smiling and saying something like, "That Stan, thank goodness Gaye found him." I do have the best brother-in-law.
Tuesday, December 23, 2008
Merry Christmas Teacher
I would like to think I have become really good over the years at making a child feel that their gift was just what I wanted, although it was a little hard with the storage bag things this year. But I just can't seem to handle the wanna be's. I asked another teacher this year how she handles it. She told me that she never opens the gifts in front of the students. Now maybe it's a southern thing, but that just seems rude not to let the giver see the pleasure on your face when you pull out their carefully chosen gift. But I thought I would give it a try. When I thanked my students for bringing the gifts and told them that I couldn't wait to open them on Christmas day I was met with shouts of "Open them now, open them now!" So that didn't work. I don't know, is there a better way to handle it short of lying and telling them that it is against my religion to accept gifts? I did try telling my students one year that they should buy a gift for the forgotten faculty instead of me like the librarian, school nurse or counselors. That didn't work either. The ones that brought gifts just had to buy an extra gift for one of the others. So is there a way to just enjoy the day for what it is, the last day before Winter Break?
Saturday, December 20, 2008
Let It Snow, Let It Snow, Let It Snow
Once I was in the appropriate shoes the fun began. Alivia definitely loves cold weather. We spent about an hour letting her sled down the hill. When Erin and I were completely frozen we decided it was time to take her in. OMG how that child can throw a tatrum. She did not want to leave the snow. Later when we discovered that we were missing some important ingredients for dinner, it was back into the sled for a trip to the store. How much fun! What child wouldn't love to live in a place where you go to the store by sled. The only drawback was that we had to deal with the tantrum again when we returned home. Maybe after a few days and when she realizes that the snow will (hopefully) still be there when she goes back outside, she will just learn to enjoy it in small doses.
Friday, December 19, 2008
Cake Balls
Saturday, December 13, 2008
It's Christmas Time In the City
Thursday, December 11, 2008
Field Trips
Sunday, December 7, 2008
My Crush
Friday, December 5, 2008
What A Week
1. Alivia - many times, but just tonight as she went into the kitchen and came out carrying a bathroom scale
2. Erin - watching Erin at dress rehearsal last night for their show Saturday
3. My Daughters - listening to them talk on the phone as they plot against me and share secrets like true sisters
4. Last Year's Students - as they performed ballroom dancing in a program this week and came to my room the day before to make sure I was going to be at the program
5. The Weatherman - when he reported that we could have up to 3 inches of snow this weekend
6. The Guy a Target - when he told me that I had beautiful eyes (too bad he was about 18 years old)
7. Old Navy - for putting coats on 50% off so that I could buy a badly needed down filled, but not overly filled jacket
8. Breakfast Club - for not serving anything that would compel me to really blow my diet
Looking back over the list, it is a little sparse. It does remind me that however few, I have had some moments to smile about.
Sunday, November 30, 2008
After the Feast
Alivia can have my share.
Wednesday, November 26, 2008
Thanksgiving Eve
Tuesday, November 25, 2008
13
Eddie: Are you thinkin' what I'm thinkin'?
Malcolm: When you hold your breath till you almost choke, that a little bit of pee comes out.
Saturday, November 22, 2008
Karma
Monday, November 17, 2008
Take A Whiff
Today my daughter and granddaughter accompanied me to Target. As soon as the door opened I was overcome by the mouthwatering aroma of the freshly popped corn. Suddenly I was flooded with memories of Saturday morning shopping trips with my mother. Strange that it took me so long to make the connection, but when I closed my eyes and stood at the top of the stairs leading down to the selling floor it all came back. It was like going home again. If only there had been a candy counter instead of a Starbucks, I would have believed that I had traveled back in time.
Mmmmm, hot, salty, crispy, buttery popcorn!
Friday, November 14, 2008
Waiting
Tuesday, November 11, 2008
Ebay
Tonight I attended American Buffalo. We took a spot at the barricade beside one of these hated people. Soon he was joined by two of his 400 pound friends who literally squeezed in so tightly against me that I was unable to move. Just as I was being squeezed out of my prime spot by one of the "tub of lards" Kevin Spacey, who had gone backstage to see Haley Joel Osment, emerged from the stage door. Moving more quickly than I would have imagined possible, they took off after him in hopes of getting an autograph. Am I evil to have been happy to see that Mr. Spacey never slowed down when they approached him? When they gave up on their quest, it was no longer possible for them to take over my space. They did however, manage to obtain a couple of signed items from Haley, but everyone waiting was able to get their playbills signed and those requesting it got a picture with the stars. Kudos to Haley, John Leguizamo and Cedric the Entertainer, they could not have been nicer to their fans. It's a pity their show is a bomb.
It really is a shame that there is such a lucrative market for celebrity memorabilia. I wish there was some way to force these wolves to get off their fat asses and get a real job.
Sunday, November 9, 2008
Apple Pickin'
Once there, we purchased a bag
Thursday, November 6, 2008
Fall Has Fallen
Sunday, November 2, 2008
Crazy For Coffee
My favorite cup of coffee comes on the day I have to open a new can. It is like a ritual. I scrubbed the pot and filter like no other day. As I remove the foil seal, I have to have my face so close that I can hear the "whoosh" as I lift the seal. The smell of the grounds almost gives me chills. I miss the old days when my coffee of choice, Folger's Columbian, came in a metal can with a metal seal. I am content to use tap water for my coffee on any other day, but on new can day I want it made with bottled water.
I am old fashion in my coffee preferences. I like the plain old stuff. Occasionally I will try a flavored coffee, but good old Columbian with real sugar and Creamora is the best. No blue or pink packet which will leave an after taste. No Coffee Mate or store brand which does not dissolve into a creamy texture will do. Even real cream is not as smooth.
I LOVE coffee!
Saturday, November 1, 2008
It's Over
Friday, October 31, 2008
Happy Halloween?
When I was older, I always spent way too much money on Halloween costumes in order to stand out at the round of parties I attended.
As a mom, I think I spent well over a month planning my daughters' costumes. I usually made them and loved seeing how my hard work paid off when my daughters put them on and looked so cute. I tried to create current characters for whom costumes had not been created (Jem, Strawberry Shortcake, Carebears). If that wasn't possible, I tried to be unique (Winter and Spring).
Halloween of 1992 changed the way I felt about Halloween forever. On the early afternoon of October 30th my family made the decision to remove my father from life support. Four days earlier you would not have known he was ill. But he had a malignant brain tumor and never woke after surgery. I have never been able to accept death easily. No matter what doctors say, I always hold out hope for a miracle. Even though if the decision had been left up to me I would never have agreed to remove the machines, I knew he was not going to recover. I also knew that he would hate to live life that held no quality. My prayer as I stood by my beloved father's bed that day was that God would take him quickly once the machines were turned off and that he would not be in pain. As the day worn on and he hung on I began to realize that Halloween was approaching and I couldn't imagine a worse day to die on. I pleaded with God to take him before midnight. When that didn't happen, I pleaded to give him one more day. One hour and 13 minutes into Halloween, my father slipped away.
I have had a lot of heartache in my life, maybe more than most. But I have never felt like God let me down until that moment. It was a long time before I forgave God, before I could find comfort in prayer. I know that God has a plan for all of us. I know that His wisdom should not be questioned. However, even after 16 years if I were given the chance to ask God one question, it would be, "Why could you not have taken him on another day?"
This year my precious granddaughter went trick or treating for the first time. Her mother bought her costume more than a month ago and had practice runs in it. She reminded me of myself when she was young. Maybe seeing Alivia walk out the gate looking like the cutest little lady bug took a little of the edge off the pain, but I don't think it will ever be "Happy Halloween" again. I miss you Daddy and I look forward to the day that we are reunited.
Thursday, October 30, 2008
The Reality
I love New York streets. I don't love driving them, but I love walking them. Tonight we had to run some errands after work and I was starving. On almost every corner is a food vendor. No bag of chips or candy bar when you can get fresh roasted nuts or any one of a dozen ethnic dishes. You can almost buy anything you need in the way of food or clothing without ever leaving the sidewalk. Weather suddenly turn cold, buy a pashmina, hat, gloves, jacket. Sudden downpour, there is an umbrella for sell on every corner. Long before moving to New York I knew that purses, watches, perfume and sunglasses were cheap and easily found on every street. From April through November there are street fairs every weekend. In Texas, where I hail from, a street fair means arts and crafts. In New York it means being able to buy amazing food, fruit, candy apples, knock-off purses, watches, sunglasses, jewelry. There are booths set up to sell socks, sheets, tools and toys imported from China. There's ice cold lemonade, "one dollar, one dollar." There are massage booths and fortune tellers too. Even when I was flat broke I loved being on the street just to watch the sights. There is nothing like a good street performance. The tumblers seem to draw the biggest crowds. I would never walk as far to see, do or buy something anywhere else. It would just be a walk to a destination. In New York, half the fun is getting there.
Sunday, October 26, 2008
The Price of Celebrity (or meeting them)
Yesterday started on a low note for me because I had hoped to meet Patty Duke. She had to cancel this week. The boys have been going to these for many years. I am a novice as this was only my third time. But even I knew that things were different this time. In the past I have played the role of place holder in line. While the boys are getting autographs in one line, I hold their place in another. By doing this, we are out of there within 4 hours of the stars arrival. Yesterday the line to get into the pit which is where the largest grouping of stars is was 4 hours long. Then once into the pit the lines began again. Linda Hamilton's line itself was at least 2 hours. In short, it was 5:00 before we walked out on aching feet in the pouring rain to make the hour drive home. Why do I do this to myself?
As I mentioned before, it really is a fun day out. I met Linda Evans, Morgan Fairchild, Angie Dickenson, Linda Hamilton (truly appreciates her fans), John Schneider, Ralph Macchio, the Sweathogs, Jamie Luner (what a nice person), Barry Williams and Cory Haim (loved him). But I have to say that the highlight of the day was sitting with Ed Asner. He felt like an old friend. I have no idea why he was not inundated with fans or why he would have the time or desire to ask me to sit with him. It really did make my day. Awwww, I love Lou Grant, but I hate the picture.
Thursday, October 23, 2008
Laughter Is the Best Medicine
Have you ever been in a situation where you get tickled about something at an inappropriate moment and start laughing? The harder you try not to laugh, the harder you laugh. There is a very serious moment near the end of the show when one of the characters yells something at another character like, "You're stupid!" The man beside Albert. one of my friends says, in a not very quiet voice, "Ooooooooo, not nice." All five of us begin to laugh. Fortunately we are not laughing hard enough for the actors to hear us, but the patrons around us certainly could. As I am just getting over a sore throat, this throws me into a coughing fit. After what feels like a good 5 minutes, Maria takes the bottle of water from me and kind of shakes it in my face. After emptying the bottle, I am finally able to stop. Then another actor blurts out another unkind comment. Again, "Ooooooooo, not nice." That was it. I couldn't stop laughing and coughing and Eric was laughing so hard he hard tears streaming down his face. After about ten minutes with my head throbbing and my side feeling like it was in a vice, the laughing subsided.
As miserable as we were at the time, when we left the theater, we were all in the best mood. I can't remember when I have laughed that hard or for that long. But afterwards it felt good. Laughter really is the best medicine.
Wednesday, October 22, 2008
I Miss My Mommy
Tomorrow I will have been sick for two weeks. My throats hurts, my head is pounding, my eyes hurt, my nose is runny and I can't stop coughing. I have been running a fever for the past three days. Since I'm the kind of teacher that seldom takes off when I am sick, I have worked every day. For anyone who is worried about the poor children who are getting exposed I ask, "Where do you think I got it?"
Everyone keeps telling me the secret to getting well. Chicken soup, tea and honey, over-the-counter everything, going to the doctor (hmmm, interesting). I know what would make me well. 1) I have to keep up the fluids 2) I need to get more rest 3) I have to just let it run its course. In a few more days I expect to be well again.
I would have been well a week ago though if I could have picked up the phone and called my mother when I got sick. She would have to me to buy some Contact, Mentholatum, and cranberry juice. Then she would have told me to drink lots of fluids and get lots of rest. She would have reminded me to get my flu shot. She would have told me that I work too hard and worry too much. It really isn't any different from what everyone else said and from what I have been doing. The only difference is that I need to hear it from her. Aren't most people that way though. It doesn't matter how old you are, when you are sick, you want your mother. So I guess the best I can do is to curl up on the bed with my comforter, close my eyes and listen to the voice in my head.
Gee, I really miss my mother.
Friday, October 17, 2008
Class Reunion
Winter Is Just Around the Corner
Last night we had a significant drop in the temperature. I love winter and all that goes with it, winter coats, boots, pashminas and snow. My students benefited from my good mood brought on by the lower temp. We spent the end of the day sitting on the carpet eating cookies as I read to them and we shared favorite memories about winter. I told them how excited I was about experiencing my first, first snow of the year three winters ago. I also told them about the little rhyme I made up when I learned first hand what happens when you step on a frozen grate. My first winter in New York I was walking home on a cold Friday evening. It was during 5:00 rush foot traffic. I was wearing a dress. Suddenly I found myself doing the splits as two gentlemen rushed to my aid and got me to my feet. I tried to avoid that route for a few weeks lest someone recognize me. Regardless, I still love winter in New York.
Two, four, six, eight - Do not step on a frozen grate
Wednesday, October 15, 2008
Marcia, Marcia, Marcia
The good news is both Maureen and I got it together eventually and are both happy with our lives. So, thanks Brady Bunch where would I be without you.
These Boots Aren't Made For Walking
Monday I began working on my semi-anual clothing exchange. Spring/summer clothes go into storage. Fall/winter clothes come out. As I sat unloading my boots I started doing some math. I put my boots on just before I walk out the door heading for work. Fifteen minutes later I arrive. It takes about ten minutes to sign in, say hello to a few folks, unlock my door, put away my things, pull off my boots and put on my "teaching shoes". By this point I have worn the boots for about 1/2 an hour. At the end of the day, I put the boots back on and unless I am going out, they are off again in twenty minutes. On the average, I wear them about an hour a day.
Tonight I am going out, the boots will stay on for a few painful (stylish) hours. By 10:00 I will work hard to cover the fact that my feet are killing me. I will try to manuver my feet, while encased in their beatiful prison, in an effort to relieve some of the uncomfortable pressure. It won't have much affect. Tomorrow and the rest of the week I will wear my comfortable flats while my feet recover. Next week I will return to wearing my favorites boots and I will enjoy looking down, for at least an hour a day.
Monday, October 13, 2008
Alivia Day
Perfect is not sufficient to describe how she behaved. From a trip on the Staten Island Ferry to a walk through the financial district to a trip uptown and to Central Park, she never whined or cried. We ate lunch on a bench and she laughed when the pigeons attacked the fries she dropped. She squealed when the ferry vibrated and did God knows what to her hearing aids. She pointed at things she wanted me to see because she has started to notice things on her own. My only regret is forgetting my camera in the car. Thank God I do not have to regret missing this wonderful day with my beautiful, sweet bundle of energy. It was a perfect first outing without mom. I loved every minute of it. We just may have to do this next week.
The Reality
BEST OF FRIENDS
When I was imagining what my life in New York would be like, it included a gay best friend who would live above me, share my fire escape and know all the best places to shop. Close. Brandon doesn't live above me, but he pretty much fulfills all the other requirements for the perfect New York best friend. I didn't even know he was gay for several months, so it wasn't as if I pursued the friendship to meet the requirement. It is because of him that I know all the best places to shop, see at least 3 shows a month, know how to get cheap tickets and have had over 100 celebrity encounters. Sometimes he drives me crazy, gives me too much information about things I probably don't need to know about and is way to organized. On the other hand, he saw to it that I didn't spend my first Thanksgiving alone and he even got Erin a part time position as a production assistant with his theater group so that she could take a short break from mommying each week and yesterday he turned me on to dim sum. So when you do the math, turns out it's better than I had imagined. Thanks Brandon!
Me and Christine Baranski
We look like we could be best friends
Friday, October 10, 2008
The Reality
It was in Manhattan. It bordered the theater district. Five flights of stairs is great for the waistline. Okay there's no getting around the four block walk to the train. But the horse stables were located close to Central Park which means I was too. There was a dog park across the street for Karma and deli on the corner that had the best breakfast for next to nothing.
With all its faults and advantages, the fact is I was just grateful to have it. I have Elyse to thank for helping me return to my dream of living in New York, but I have Erin to thank for finding an apartment. While we were searching I kept remembering an episode of "Friends" when Ross was checking the obituaries for an apartment. I wish it was that easy. I began my search by contacting an agent. He showed me a tiny studio/efficiency for $1700 and wanted $4000 to lease it to me. I decided I could do better with Craigs List, a newspaper and a membership to an online apartment locator. What I found was that in New York, "open house" means getting in line an hour before it starts and knowing that if you are not first in line you will not get the apartment. I couldn't believe what people would fight for; an apartment so small that a twin bed would not fit in the only room, an apartment where you could cook while sitting on the toilet, an apartment where the 15 year old kid on the stoop has a key to every apartment in the building and would be happy to let you in. My daughter managed to talk a maintenance man into showing her an apartment the day before the open house, she convinced me that I should call the leasing agent and tell them that I would take it, sight unseen. I did and truth be told, I wish I was still there. I know I will eventually return to the city and go through it all again. For now I am content with my basement in the Bronx.
Tuesday, October 7, 2008
Life After 50
Long before I actually left for New York, I was imagining what my life would be like. I thought about everything from where I would live, to what my apartment would be like, to how I would dress and who my friends would be.
I saw myself living in a combination of Meg Ryan’s apartments from Kate and Leopold and You’ve Got Mail. Like Holly Golightly in Breakfast at Tiffanys, there would be a fire escape on which I could gain access to the apartment below or above where my gay male best friend lived. I would have a stoop where I would sit on summer days. My apartment would be on an upper floor, because unlike apartments in Texas which are seldom more than 2 stories high, it would have an elevator. It would be located on the east side, midtown, although, Gramercy Park or Chelsea would be okay. There would be a great deli on the corner and a small grocery store with a wonderful produce section across the street. The subway would not be on my block, but not more than two blocks away. A wonderful old couple who had been married forever would live across the hall from me. They would teach me everything I needed to know about living in New York. In exchange, I would pick up a few things for them when I ran errands or help them get to their occasional appointment. They would invite me for dinner once a week, and sometimes there would be a single friend they wanted me to meet.
Due to the fact that I would be taking as little as possible with me to New York, I would for the most part have to purchase a whole new wardrobe. Everything I bought would be totally New York, although I wasn’t sure exactly what that was. When I returned to Texas for an occasional visit I would feel totally conspicuous in my new clothes. I would never wear less than a two-inch heels unless I was running Saturday morning errands or taking Kharma to the dog park. I would of course have a purse to match every pair of shoes. Best of all, I would own multiple coats. I have as most people in South and Central Texas always owned three coats; a raincoat, a long coat and a short coat in neutral colors. My first coat purchase would be either cobalt blue or red.
My new friends would not be unlike most of the friends I have now, but there would be much more exciting things to do with them, going to; the ballet, the theatre, weekend trips, happy hours at places with great atmosphere. As a result of all the evening outings, my evening wear would outnumber my day wear for the first time in my life. I would even find it necessary to own an extensive wardrobe of high-heel shoes and dress coats in an array of colors.
I found it increasingly difficult to fall asleep at night with this romantic vision of my new life dancing in my head. The only thing that stood between my and this exciting new life was 2000 miles.
“Why,” I ask myself, “would a 52 year old woman whose whole life has been lived according to Murphy’s Law want to sell everything she owns and move 2,000 miles away from family and friends. Why move to a place she has only visited twice and one of those visits had been 30 years ago.”
The first time I visited New York City, I was 21 years old. A traveling companion for a friend of my mother’s whose own children had no desire to see the world. Lucky me. I didn’t know it then, but I realize it now, that I was seeing the city, not through the eyes of a tourist, but through the eyes of a future resident. I even told Clara, the lady I was traveling with, that I wanted to live here someday. She responded with something like, “Your mother would kill me.” But anyhow, I wasn’t so much interested in seeing the Statue of Liberty of the Empire State Building as I was in watching the people. Anyone who has ever spent much time in New York or who lives there can spot a tourist a mile away. They stroll. They stop mid-sidewalk. They look up. They walk side-by-side blocking the sidewalk. They don’t have to have a camera in their hand or a subway map to stand out as a tourist. So it was easy to pick out the residents, and to watch them. There was just something about New Yorkers that I was drawn to. I wanted to be one of them.
Almost 30 years later, my youngest daughter gets accepted to Fordham University and the dream was alive again. So I applied for a teaching position. When I told my Elyse, my daughter, that the New York City Department of Education was interested in interviewing me, she told me in no uncertain terms that if I moved to New York, she would stay in Austin. Apparently the reason for applying to schools that are 2.000 miles from home is to be on your own, not have your mother follow you. She did permit me to visit, once. I spent a week in March visiting her. Almost from the moment we set foot outside the hotel the first morning, the old feeling came back. Some people might think that the week’s worth of freezing rain and snow might have convinced me that New York was not such a great place to live. It didn’t.
I was secretly thrilled when my daughter decided to come home after her freshman year. I knew she was miserable there. But, just because she was back in Texas did not mean the DOE was no longer interested in me. In fact they were sending someone to Austin and wanted to interview me. I went. They offered me a job. I accepted it.
A dream 30 years in the making was about to come true. I’m not sure what I was expecting to happen. What did happen was what I should have expected. Everything that could go wrong, did go wrong. At the end of the year when a normal people would be packing their bags and heading home, I was looking to stay.