Ebay

I hate ebayers. I don't hate the people that buy on ebay, it's some of the people that sell. I attend 3 - 4 Broadway shows a month. After the show we wait at the stage door to get our playbills signed by the actors. Without fail, there is always a group of 400 pound men already waiting at the barricades with their Duane Reade bags full of photos, poster and books waiting to get them signed. If the actor(s) are in a charitable mood, they will sign at least some of them. The next day they are for sale on ebay. As often as not though the actors are first greeted by these losers and can't get to the real fans without dealing with them first. It's a lose-lose situation. If they sign the massive amounts of souvenirs presented to them, then they will not reach all of the true fans and theater-goers. If they refuse to sign they are greeted by harassing remarks about how they don't appreciate their fans, making the celebrity look ungrateful. Occasionally, the crowd is small enough to satisfy everyone or the stage door manager can take care of the ebayers quietly.

Tonight I attended American Buffalo. We took a spot at the barricade beside one of these hated people. Soon he was joined by two of his 400 pound friends who literally squeezed in so tightly against me that I was unable to move. Just as I was being squeezed out of my prime spot by one of the "tub of lards" Kevin Spacey, who had gone backstage to see Haley Joel Osment, emerged from the stage door. Moving more quickly than I would have imagined possible, they took off after him in hopes of getting an autograph. Am I evil to have been happy to see that Mr. Spacey never slowed down when they approached him? When they gave up on their quest, it was no longer possible for them to take over my space. They did however, manage to obtain a couple of signed items from Haley, but everyone waiting was able to get their playbills signed and those requesting it got a picture with the stars. Kudos to Haley, John Leguizamo and Cedric the Entertainer, they could not have been nicer to their fans. It's a pity their show is a bomb.

It really is a shame that there is such a lucrative market for celebrity memorabilia. I wish there was some way to force these wolves to get off their fat asses and get a real job.